Soooooo painful

I woke this morning with positivity and was going to get my leg on and go for a short walk, with Dad in tow again. The bruising looked a bit better first thing so already another positive was to be had, all in a short space of time. Unfortunately things started to landslide from here on in and rather rapidly too. The moment had arrived to climb into my leg so on went the thick sock and I was off, but not running. The leg went on but I felt that it was too twisted and the plastic was……. let’s just say not in a comfortable position round the back. I took it off and put it back on again but felt too loose and swinging about at the top of the socket. I thought that if I put a thin sock on I may get further into the socket, so out I came again and swapped socks. After climbing back in the difference felt minimal and thought it was better to have the thick sock on and not have the socket slide up and down on the stump. Socks switched back and I was back in again, I had a bit of skin in the back of the leg that hadn’t gone in properly so tried to push it down. After struggling for a bit it felt like there was a little pinch but just gave up and thought the movement of walking would sort to out. I walked out to the Kitchen and it was incredibly painful. I concentrated on tightening the muscles to stop me moving or rolling in the socket which I hoped would alleviate the pain but it didn’t. I did what I went out there to do, then walked back into my lounge and it was the worse pain I have ever had from the socket. I promptly removed the leg and just sat there for a bit in disbelief at what had just happened and question how I can go from being so positive, to so low, so quickly. I have decided that I will leave it a couple of days and then try again to see if I can ascertain the problem. At the moment I am not sure if it is as a result of the leg being lengthened or from the type of exercises I was doing in physio this week. Until I know the answer to that we can’t really deal with it. It just seems that this socket will never be able to allow me to do everything you should be able to do on a prosthesis. I am tempted to say just get me to a point where I can walk on it relatively pain free and let me walk and exercise on it but forget the physio. When the stump goes down enough to have another socket done then I will start physio again when I am in a position to use a leg to its full potential without being in copious amounts of pain. I think it is actually more frustrating now because before the leg was raised and physio this week it felt pretty good, with just the slightest feeling at the front. It is now even more painful than it ever was before but that could be due to some bruising inside that I can’t see. Even though I only wore the leg briefly this morning but there was already redness showing from where it was digging in/rubbing, please let this get better!

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