A rough week

So after Manic Monday the rest of the week was a slow slope downwards really. Tuesday we went for our first trip down to Wickford without seeing Nan. We went to my Uncles to talk about and sort out some arrangements for the Funeral, which we found out would be on the following Monday. My Uncle had also got us a copy of the Death Certificate, which was nice as I have been researching the family history and its good to get certificates where you can. There was a bit of a shock though as the main cause of death was Metastatic Lung Cancer. Basically metastatic tumours in the lungs are cancers that developed at other places in the body (or other parts of the lungs) and spread through the bloodstream or lymphatic system to the lungs. It is different to lung cancer that starts in the lungs. They had only spoken to us of Cancer about a week before she died and did mention Chemotherapy, which we didn’t want done, as it would have been too traumatic and prolonged the inevitable for her. She has had Asthma all her life and has always had a barking cough, the last few years she did keep getting chest infections too. Also on the certificate was Ischaemic Heart disease, which is a disease of the blood vessels supplying the heart muscles with oxygen that’s severe enough to cause temporary strain on the heart or even permanent damage to the muscle. When the heart muscle becomes ischemic, a person may experience angina or heart attack. Chronic Kidney Disease and Bronchiectasis were also on the cause of death. With all that affecting her it is hard to comprehend how she survived as long as she did, Nan was one tough tiny person.

I had already asked my family if I could wear my uniform to the funeral and had also gained permission from Cadets to wear it. There was a small issue here in that I felt the new combat uniform we have is not smart to say the least so I was going in my No. 2 Dress, but there was a small issue there too. Because I have become a bit of a heifer I couldn’t fit into my Jacket, well that’s not strictly true. I could get the jacket on but after stretching it round me and doing the buttons up I couldn’t move my arms, either using a wheelchair or crutches that’s a major drawback. As for the skirt, lets not go there. While we were down Essex I managed to get a set of men’s No. 2 Dress from Field Textiles. There were a couple of reasons for getting men’s uniform, 1. They didn’t have a female set, 2. I was going to be on crutches all day so it’s easier to move around, 3. After doing a risk assessment and knowing from previous experience there was a high risk of falling over, the trousers would be better protection for my skin, 4. Forward thinking means it will be easier to wear and move around if I need to do PR work/Photography for Cadets but need to be in No. 2 Dress. The problem with the set I got was it was a Royal Signals jacket belonging to a private, I borrowed my Uncles PC to order buttons, lanyard, collar dogs, Sgt. Stripes and crown etc. to make sure we had everything to get it changed in time. Thankfully everything did get there on time but we spent a lot of the week getting it all ready. Mum was a star as I cant sew for toffee so she did that for me, I pressed the shirt, jacket and trousers and spent hours on my boot to get it gleaming. Just in the nick of time everything was ready for the funeral.

The weekend before the funeral I was looking forward to the LimbPower Games (formerly the Amputee Games), at Stoke Mandeville, as I was gutted I missed it last year. I had loads of questions for the other amputees, wanted to meet people and was dying to try the sports on offer. Unfortunately all that week I had been feeling ill with an upset stomach, headaches and just generally feeling pants, I had to make the agonising decision not to go. I was so disappointed but hopefully next year will be my year and I am looking forward to it already. If I was feeling up to it I was going to cover the Cadet Regional First Aid Competition at our County Headquarters but unfortunately I couldn’t make that either.

I think the excitement of the games and the worry of getting everything ready for the funeral and the funeral itself was just too much for me at that time. I was starting to reduce the medication, which wasn’t going too bad but that on top off everything else wasn’t helping. I hoped that after the funeral and everything settled down a bit my body would settle down too. Although it was a rough week and I missed the games, which I’m still gutted about, I managed to get everything as I wanted it to be to say goodbye to Nan.

Death Certificate

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