The phantom rises

Last night was unpleasant to say the least. I noticed when I was reading in bed last night that the phantom sensations were incredibly high and worse than it had been for ages. Now I could be wrong but I am guessing that it had something to do with the trauma it was subjected to during the physio session yesterday. I don’t really understand what would have happened to cause this but with phantom pains being such a mystery it could be anything. So what did I feel? Well the nerves in the stump were alive with tingling, my foot (that isn’t there) was also electric with nerves constantly firing, the stump randomly jumped involuntary and there was one more thing. This is really hard to explain, it is like there are air pockets inside the stump and the phantom foot that are moving around. They move across the stump, foot or both, then go, then come back and travel in all different directions. There can be bigger sized ones that seem to move slowly and then there seem to be many smaller ones that seem to travel quicker. I thought I would have to get up and take more medication to deal with it but I was so tired last night before I turned the light off I seemed to cope with it. Holding the stump up or rubbing it stops the feelings but not long after the stump is back flat on the bed it starts again, it is really bad before it ease a little but it never stops. The last few nights (probably just under a week) I have had trouble because of being woken during the night with pain in my hip and stump, when laying on the amputated side (which had been fine previously). It is like a horrendous ache but with numbness rolled in for good measure, it even hurts when I try and turn over, especially the stump. I hope this all settles down quickly because that could be another reason why I am a bit down at the moment.

I had a list of jobs to get done today and a new one even presented itself this morning. I only managed to get a couple of them done then got totally distracted and then slid into a bit of online retail therapy. I told myself I wouldn’t buy anymore clothes on principle and that I would have to loose weight to get back into the ones I have. I can’t see me shifting much weight in the near future so some bargains at Sports Direct where calling. I phoned the community care at Doddington Hospital to find out where I was on the list, this is to have the house reviewed for a grant to get the bathroom converted to a wet room. I was told that as an amputee I would be a priority and go to the bottom of the top list and would be seen within 12 weeks. A lady that phoned back this afternoon told me there was still another ten people in front of me and at the moment the waiting list is 16 weeks. I was also told that because I am only looking to get wet room, even though I have been banned from using the shower and the bath and have to strip wash, I am not a priority and I am at the bottom end of the bottom list. Hmmmm a down ward spiral I am on at the moment bah humbug!

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